OK, so back to the mindfulness issue.
Since I seem to be working from
a Jewish perspective and starting from food, here's some further illustration.
Harold Kushner (the guy who wrote "Why Bad Things Happen to Good People" as well
as "To Life!", a book I highly recommend, on the basic attitudes of Jewish
theology) writes that Jews say specific blessings before eating not just to thank
God but because it's the next best thing to vegetarianism. This way, you are at
least acknowledging the lifes that died to keep you alive.
In my own
life, I'm not really working from what Shrub might refer to as a "faith-based
perspective". I'm thinking I need to appreciate more aspects of my life for my own
sake, to enrich that same life. It's easy for me to begin arguing from the
tradition in which I was brought up, but I'm really working at least as much from
Socrates' stricture on the unexamined life as I am from Judaic traditions of
thought.
The problem is the same one I was discussing before the
holidays, the same discontent that has me revamping my workout and complaining
about my commute, and I think
href="http://mechaieh.diaryland.com/nobrood.html">Mechaieh's post yesterday
may be pointing me to a more accurate diagnosis. At present I think that the
problem may be that when I am very busy and I don't have much down time, it's easy
for life to become a set of scurryings from place to place, an obstacle course in
which even the things I like to do become one more damn obligation. I'm beginning
to think that maybe living in the moment, being mindful of each thing, is part of
a solution. Simply scaling back is a more obvious fix, but it's not really
feasible, especially since most of my stressors are actually good things in
themselves. I can't shorten my commute without changing jobs. I really like this
one and I'm not nearly ready to leave it; I like this company a lot; and I need to
stay with it for a long time to establish continuity on my resume. I don't want to
cut back on exercise too much because if I row less I'll do badly in races, and
because I worked hard for my current level of fitness, such as it is.
It sometimes gets to the point where my mind is a frantic blur, like
confetti in a whirlwind and even the things I know are good for me look like
intolerable burdens. Camping might be relaxing when I get there, but packing and
driving out on Friday night after a week of work can look like too high a wall to
climb.
I think more mindful living might help. The people who seem
best at the sort of consciousness I'm thinking of usually seem to identify as
artists; Mechiaeh and
href="http://kuinileti.diaryland.com">Kuinileti are good examples.
href="http://thistledown.diaryland.com">Thistledown and
href="http://paisleypiper.diaryland.com">Paisleypiper are two who live
together, which must be particularly effective, though even so most of these
people would probably say that theior lives are far less serene than they look
from outside. They've all carved out time for art and artful pursuit of living. I
know I'll never get to the same extent because my mind doens't work the same way,
because I'm not an artist by talent or temperament, and because, frankly, I enjoy
a bit of chaos and flutter, within limits. It lets me know I'm alive. So this is
why, so example, I've added more variety to my workouts, decided not to emphasize
racing this season, and begun trying to focus on using my morning rows to clear my
mind. Maybe if I plan but don't worry about things ahead, the confetti in my head
will start to settle. Maybe if I try to live in each moment while it's here, the
moments won't fly by so fast. I've already got my drive time to listen to books or
the radio (singing and reading are almost the only things that are never, never
chores for me, no matter what). I need to slow down in speaking also, to calm my
hamster-wheel brain and compose my words; I know this is something I have to do to
become a better teacher and mentor, two major facets of my job.
Despite all the supposed furor of modern life, I don't think it's a
new problem -- why else all the Torah stories about taking time to bless eating,
drinking, waking up, going to sleep, starting, ending, living? And why else are
there all those stories about God speaking only not in a whirlwind but in a still
small voice? Susbtitute "life" or "my best self" or "truth" or what you will for
"God" -- in this case it's all the same for practical purposes. (But please, don't
call it "sharpening the saw".)