I very nearly slugged an old woman the other day, and she wasn't even doing
anything to hurt me. I'm a violent person, I guess; small as I am, I don't really
worry about actually hurting other people, so I've never had that reason to
restrain myself. The main reason I don't go around actually hitting other people
is that it's just not fair to hit someone who is too chivalrous to hit you back.
Plus, you know, there are all those laws and customs about manners and all that.
In this particular case, though, I was this close to at least
taking her aside and yelling at her. This is an annoying woman anyway, but she
really surpassed herself that day. I was chatting with her and another person, and
shall refer to them henceforth as A and B. A is getting over a nasty cold and the
ensuing cough has been keeping her awake at night. B suggested a shot of whiskey,
with honey and lemon. A responded that she doesn't drink.
So far,
okay, and even my finely-honed annoyance trigger wouldn't have been set off. B,
however, said, "Oh, it's just one drink." A said, "Nope, sorry, I don't do it." B
said, "Well, what about some wine?" and on and on and so fucking on. I mean
really, what part of "I don't" is so hard to understand?
Now, I have
a personal principle, by which if someone says they don't eat or drink a certain
item, I do not urge them to try "just a little bit" For one thing, they might be
allergic, in which case I'd far rather be spared the gory details, not to mention
the possible consequences if they did try just a bit. For another, as a light and
sometimes picky eater myself, I am convinced that one of the joys of adulthood is
not being forced to consume foods you don't like or want, one of the banes of my
childhood.
With alcohol especially, there may be many reasons why a
person wouldn't drink. The three that spring to my mind, however, are dislike of
the taste or effects of strong drink; a physical allergy; or avoidance of the
consequences of known or suspected alcoholism. In the first case, a single small
drink for medicinal purposes might be acceptable, but in the latter two cases,
even a small drink could be downright dangerous.
Not only that, while
the lemon and honey in the suggested whiskey might indeed soothe a sufferer's
throat, the whiskey itself would probably not help a sick person to sleep more
restfully. (Though a sufficient quantity could cause passing out, it's been my
observation that people rarely spring up from that state refreshed and full of
joie de vivre).
I have nothing against drinking myself, but urging it
on someone who doesn't want it is stupid. And rude. And an adult who, as I have
reason to know, has been around for many, many discussions of why people do not
like being urged to partake of drink they donŐt want should damned well know
better.
The only reason I didn't take B aside in this case is that I
know that A is perfectly able to take care of herself. And if slugging were
required, she could probably do that better than I could,
anyhow.
Sheesh.
And now I'm off to buy champagne, and
maybe some wine to go with the steak au poivre I'm making tonight. May 2002 be
happier and better for all of us.