August 28, 2001

radio dreams

The good news: I have an interview scheduled. The bad news: the company sounds
great but is way farther away than I want to drive on a daily basis. I wonder how
they feel about telecommuting?

For the last couple of nights, I've
had unpleasant dreams -- not nightmares, just unpleasant dreams. I don't really
remember last night's, except for the sense of nagging frustration and entrapment,
but on the night before last, I dreamed I was volunteering on a folk-music radio
show. Everybody there was very nice to me at first. A listener came by and
requested a song on a particular subject; I said, "I know!" There's one by
Christine Lavin that's perfect for that!" Everyone agreed with me that the song
would be great. Lavin is a Big Name in contemporary folk, so I knew the radio
station would have her music. I went over to the woman actually spinning the CDs,
but she wouldn't let me look for it in her stack, so I had to go over to the back
room archives. I couldn't argue with her because we were on the air and had to be
silent.

By the time I found the disc I wanted, the show was over and
it was too late to play it. That's when the people there told me they didn't like
to play that song because it had the word "damn" in it, though bleeped out. In
fact, they didn't like to play Lavin at all, because she says "damn" in TWO songs,
and some listeners might be offended. (Note that this was in the dream; as far as
I can remember, the real Christine Lavin never uses any profanity in her
lyrics.)

I can't be sure, but I'd interpret this as my subconscious
linking work and frustration, colored by the stories of the friends I met in LA a
few weeks ago, who did go to the studio of a folk music show after I'd left. (The
woman who runs that show probably doesn't play Lavin either, but only because she
focuses on traditional music.)

My subconscious apparently doesn't
want me to go back to work. However, since it's permanently attached to the parts
of me that like to eat, wear clothes, and sit in an air-conditioned house when
it's 114 degrees out*, that's just too bad.

On the other hand, when
I am working, typically I only dream about it when I get very stressed out and am
working long hours, so maybe this was a sign of being tired of not working.
Or maybe it was just the firing of random neurons.

Plan for today:
begin work on my book proposal. The promotion plan is going to be the scary
part.

*It was 114 degrees, in fact, day before yesterday. Arizona
summers are not one of my favorite things. We're going camping this weekend,
though, so we will probably get some good storms.

Posted by dichroic at August 28, 2001 10:59 AM
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